‘Sister, till now, I feel difficult to accept what had happened to me in the past; and I hate it, I hate my past so much...’ said a close friend of mine. ‘Because of that, I kind of seeing sorrow in my future and I don’t want to go forward as I am terrified that the same thing will happen again.’ She ended her half-an-hour sharing with tears.
I looked at her sympathetically; not any word I could say yet. I didn’t want to hurt her feeling. I could imagine if I were at her place, I might not be as strong as she was. I remembered seeing her smiling and being so calm at that time when some of ‘trusted’ people tried to put her down in so many ‘weird’ and ‘crazy’ ways. I knew it was not a fault for her to admit the pain she had gone through. But for me, I could not let myself being immersed into her past. Yet I need to help her bringing herself out of the problem and looking back to it from a different horizon. I believe this is how a counsellor always works.
So, I tried to begin my word with a question. ‘Sister, despites your past, are you happy now?’ She looked at me, frowning and said, ‘Alhamdulillah, of course, I am. It is so much pleasure to know and to be with the people that around me now. I know they love me for Allah; and I love them for ALLAH to, insya-allah. Why is that, sister?’
I smiled. ‘I know I am not the best person to say this; because as you know, I was not the one who went through those horrible experiences.’ ‘Oh, come on, sister. You know I would love to listen to any kind of sharing,’ she said.
‘Thank you. You know sister, it seems a ‘fate’ destined by the Lord of the world that in order to be ‘special’; there will always be so much troubles that we need to go through. For instance, in order to be the most beautiful and sparkling diamond; there are so much difficulties and hardships that the black ‘carbon’ has to go through. Do you know that? The diamond was not formed easily; it has to go through so much heat, force and cut under and above the earth that we could hardly imagine. And then, when all the process is done successfully, there comes the diamond that worth thousand pounds; so enchanting and bewitching so many eyes.’
‘The same goes to us, sister. Allah could let us have an ‘easy’ and ‘trouble-free’ life. But, then, how can we become ‘special’? Special here I think, I would love to refer in both worlds; being special in this world and special in the next world.’
‘How come the troubles and problems made me special in this world, sister?’ she asked.
‘You are special, sister and you should know that. The problems make you special because with them, you are now more ‘expert’ on ‘human’ in general than me. You could understand others’ pain when they are facing similar situations better than me. Sister, if not, how come our beloved Prophet, Muhammad S.A.W. was made by ALLAH to be the man who experienced the most of troubles and tribulations exist in this world. Let us count how much horrible situation he had gone through in his life.’
‘He experienced the sad childhood, if you like to call it; because his father died before his birth, because his mum died in front of him, because he was brought up by an uncle who has 10 other children, because he had to work as a ‘shepherd’ since he was little and so much more. And later on, as he was pronounced to be the ‘messenger’, he experienced being ‘swore’, ‘stab-backed’ and ‘fitnah’ by his own ‘trusted’ people. Then, he experienced the siege, the death of his beloved ones; his wife and his closest uncle and so many other things that we can say ‘horrifying’ experiences before he was now is known as ‘the most influential figure in the world’. Wasn’t he’s seen as so ‘special’ in so many people’s eyes because of his patience and... I shall call ‘success’ to deal with those tribulations, sister?’
She was silent. I knew she was trying to think and relate those words with her situation. Soon as she looked better, I continued. ‘People who experience little difficulties and challenges understand little about this world; because this world is all about challenges. Since born we faced various challenges; but we never gave up. Look at the babies! If they give up in their learning walking now they could never walk when they grow up. And, sister, we were those babies; and we were those who were success to go through all the challenges in the ‘babies-world’. So, because we did not give up in the past; so never give up now, sister!’
‘There are so many things in the future that now we do not know yet. It is a secret; kept nicely by ALLAH. Why we are frightened by something that we actually do not know yet? May be, we never know that whether those people who has done so badly to us in the past; have changed and have sought forgiveness from ALLAH.. Hopefully, insya-allah. Aren’t we happy for them for joining the ‘good’ crowd like the prophet S.A.W. and his companion were so happy when they receive the most furious ‘kuffar’ generals, Khalid Ibn Walid and A’mr al-asr to join them (Muslim brotherhood)?’
‘So, in short, I would like to say to myself as well as you, my dear sister; NEVER LET THE PAST HUNT US DOWN. All the challenges and difficulties appear in our life path are granted by HIM, the Lord of the World, who knows BEST in everything at every time; to make us SPECIAL in this world and in the NEXT, insya-allah. Never give up, and never lose hope, insya-allah. Let us Put our FULL TRUST only to HIM, the ONLY BEST sustainer and the maintainer of the world. Insya-allah.’
‘Wallahua’lam. (Allah knows best)’
Soon as I finished, she hugged me, like she always does.
‘Thank you so much,’ she said with a sparkling eyes and sincere smile.
Video for reflection:
[Click here to watch how diamond is formed and cut]
[Click here to watch cute walking babies]
[Click here to watch the best ‘picture’ of Muhammad S.A.W. (Peace be upon him)]
p/s: last bit... Enjoy one of my favourite singers, Maher Zain with his 'Insya-allah' song! ^^